Aside from gaining weight during three pregnancies (and far more than the “healthy” level for the first two) and consciously losing it afterwards, my weight has usually been “average” with a few highs and lows. Since I am fairly tall (5’8), a few extra pounds are easier to carry. Being underweight was more obvious as my long limbs looked longer than usual and along with that came comments (usually from my parents) about not eating enough. In my 30s I became really interested in nutrition, sleep and well-being, logically enough as I was a young, sleep-deprived mother of two children born seriously close together. I also became more involved in sports, running and amateur competitions, mainly half-marathons. Suddenly, eating well became a way of fueling my body for exercise, or just for the endurance a young parent needs. I was disciplined about sleep, nutrition and exercising as much as my schedule permitted, and I realized that this made me feel great, inside and out. Still, I did not have a “safe” relationship with food. I felt like I was always a step away from danger. I never allowed myself to enjoy food in any way. My mentality stayed focused on “willpower” and “deprivation”. And so often I would find my willpower eroding, enjoy a good binge, and make up for it by more deprivation and over-exercising. And so the unhealthy cycle continued. When I moved to Paris, France, entire new food groups were suddenly a part of my everyday life – full-fat, delicious cheese straight from the farms. Fresh, preservative-free bread, amazing desserts from patisseries just a stone’s throw from our front door. Just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Of course, given my odd relationship with food, being in such close proximity to delicious food revered the world over was a source of discomfort. At first, I just ignored it all. I could’ve been living in Paris, Texas and not in Paris, France as far as my dinner plate was concerned. It’s been almost 15 years since I arrived in France, and although I live in a different part of the country now, the eating habits I picked up have totally transformed my relationship with food, in the best possible way. Finally! It didn’t happen overnight, but it did happen. I’ve realized that for me, depriving myself - especially when there’s such great food available fresh at my doorstep - is a surefire path back to old, unhealthy habits such as yo-yo dieting, and a less enjoyable life. A while back I wrote about a similar topic, surveying what I’ve learned from my half-French children’s eating habits. This time, I wanted to offer a list of the MODERATION-based habits I’ve learned. It has made all the difference in the world for me: foods I once considered forbidden (or reserved for “binge” mode), are now part of my weekly or monthly intake. Of course, moderate eating is not just a French habit. But it is pretty much a cultural given, one I encountered it again and again, among friends, acquaintances, family, doctors, nutritionists (someday I will write about my first encounter with a famous Paris-based nutritionist!), business associates, bakers, butchers, teachers, etc. The message finally stuck. Today, I enjoy food without guilt, my weight is completely stable, I don’t diet, and I feel better than I ever have in my life. And I eat whatever I want. Below are a list of tips that work for me. If you, like me, have found your relationship with food is a fragile truce, I hope they will help transform your life too!